The DIETER’S PSALM — Psalm 23?

21 May


they often turn to the Bible, and to the Psalms, in particular, for comfort and encouragement.

This is a Psalm to which they often turn first:
“The Dieter’s Psalm”.

The LORD is my restaurateur, I shall not be in want. 2 He makes me lie down in green pastures of romaine and endive; he leads me beside ‘quiet waters’ of chocolate fountains, 3 he restores my sole… and my salmon.
He guides me in paths of pasta, like righteously-rich lasagna dripping with ricotta. For his name’s sake, I’ll have ‘seconds’. Occasionally he invites, “Penne for your thoughts.” 4 Even though I walk through the valley of the shadow of death-dealing Calories, I will fear no evil, for you are with me wherever escargot. Your maître d’ and your staff, they comfort me. 5 You prepare a table before me in the presence of my enemies, who are eating their hearts out because they cannot get reservations. You anoint my head with Columela extra virgin olive oil; my cup overflows with the perfect mix of mint leaves, lemon and fresh spring water. 6 Surely goodness and love and light French crepes with strawberries & peaches will follow me all the days of my life, and I will dwell in Chez God’s “All-you-can-eat” forever.

© 2012 Stephen P. Raine

It is believed that King David–both as a young shepherd and as Monarch–wrote his Psalms while playing his harp.

This Psalm was scribbled while banjo picking.


Lord, we thank you for your gifts of Love & Laughter. May we rejoice and exult in the “Good News” of your Gospel–the “Good News” that is Jesus! Help our ‘shirts’ to only be stuffed with ourselves; not with pompous attitudes and self-righteousness. May we always take your Gospel seriously, but never take ourselves too seriously. Help us remember that Jesus–as the only perfect human being–laughed the deepest, the loudest and the longest. Amen.


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